Wednesday, September 2, 2009

My Second Mistake

After some thinking Ive discovered what my second mistake was with my relationship with Charlotte. I wish I could go back and change it, but I cant be the one to undo it, that would require her.

Its funny... people like me wait to get into relationships. We dont go from person to person willy nilly. We spend most of our time single. And when we do finally find someone we connect with, someone we can really love and let that really take hold of us. We make mistakes. We make mistakes that a more experienced person wouldnt make. We make mistakes that when we go back and think about it, we say "Really? I did that? What the fuck was I thinking?!". We make mistakes on the relationships that really count, the ones that we really want to see go far, and we pay for that inexperience, for our self-righteousness. We burn ourselves.

I believe I now know largely what caused her love to wain. And its all my fault.
Ive made my mistake, I wont ever make it again. I played myself the fool again.

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